Wednesday, March 2, 2016

And so life goes on


It's been just over two months, 10 weeks to be exact since last I blogged.

Not that I blogged regularly, but most of the time they were happy, informative and even interesting.  The last one for 2015 was informative. But so very hard and sad to write.

I am still very very sad. Grieving is not at all easy to get over. It takes one day at a time, hour by hour. I say this because I had a belief that losing my spouse would be later [for one thing] MUCH Later in our lives. Also because having lost my parents, a brother, a sister, [in laws] that I knew how this process worked.

Well, I am writing to say that is not at all how it is.  I hurt every morning, a deep hurt inside that is yet to begin to ease. The tears come at any given moment, even when I am busy busy with grand children, friends, stitching, cooking, even cleaning.

And the then there is the traveling..driving roadways that we drove together...for some reason I can not get passed all the memories of places we would go, times we enjoyed. So I drive with the box of tissues and hope I can see the road through my tears. [Yes I can get a ticket for driving impaired..I know this].

As for the family, the children, their children...they are slowly moving forward. But not all that smoothly. And I can only try and help/support them. As they try to help/support me. We all miss Hank so much.

Happily, we do talk about him. We do laugh, cry together some. The boys are less apt to cry, but all the girls...we talk and cry together.

Ten weeks...two months...the paperwork continues...the phone calls begin to try and sort out how to manage the final expenses. And other pieces and parts of life continue on as usual...stitching times...meetings...church...parties...and more.

Maybe now, that this is recorded, there will be more sewing news here and happy days to report.  But know that tomorrow is not promised, hug your loved ones, forgive them, forgive yourself. AND PRAY...God does work in the quiet moments, sending just the right people at just the right time.

THANK YOU to all who have been sent my way recently...I am grateful.